08 October 2006

Po-Boys, poboys and poor boys...

A friend of mine recently sent me an email asking about the nature of the supposed greatness of New Orleans po-boys. So, this is a quick description and a little bit of a 'don't you tell me your yankee subs can beet out po-boys any day of the week.' In the spirit of our friendship, I posted the response and am keeping her name anonymous for her own safety from the po-boy patrol. It begins like this:

Your question about Po-Boys is not such a simple one to answer because the greatness of New Orleans Po-Boys is such a "great thing" that it cannot simply be explained. It has to be understood in such a way that you've experienced it. And, experienced it in the right places. But, if were to sum it up in a quick, let's cut to the artery on things, it's all in the French Bread. Sure, the northern mind could say that it's nothin' but like a hoagie bread. However, it's nothing like a hoagie bread. It's like the sandwich bread that Jesus would have made had he been a baker instead of a carpenter. We make all sorts of sandwiches together with them and when I figure out how to do it, maybe I'll send you a half loaf of french bread. I say a half loaf because the full loaf is a yard long. I'll try to go to one of the bread places so that it is freshly made and it'll won't be all grody and shit by the time it get to you. Since I got a bunch of stamps, I may even try and send it overnight (d'pending on the price) so that you can then understand. We even have french fry po-boys that the dress and poor roast beef po-boy gravy on. Yum. You are missing out on food like all-fuck down here! But, yes, it IS much different that a hoagie and a sub. So, the simple answer is da bread.

And, what's the rage? No rage, we just always done rolled like d'at. And as for your commentary about your subs beating our po-boys...Only a philly cheese steak from Philly could beat one of our po-boys (if the bread is fresh). So don't get all uppity on d'at one. And if I could send you a roast beef po-boy, dressed, 'extra sloppy' without the end result in the mailbox being tragic...or a fried oyster po-boy...or even a french fry po-boy, you'd have a change of heart. What I'd normally write is that%2


  1. Having been to Philthadelphia more times than I care to admit, I gotta tell ya - their sandwiches aren't much to crave, rave about or drool over. In the 20+ genuine Philthy cheese steaks I've had (all within Philly city limits), I'm only able to count ONE as good and memorable.

    Placenta Po? Anyone? ...Anyone?

    Speaking of which, I got to inspect AK's Pussy Pilot. It's...not so good. Crazily enough though, I could probably swallow it if he didn't have all that chest hair. I'll send you a pic. I just can't catch a fucking break.

    Current Mood: Wanton
    Music: Face Down, Ass Up
    by 2 Live Crew

  2. Why don't you get Cz boy to trim and shave that bizzy down? And a placenta po-boy? Um, I knew we're both a lil fuct, but in case you haven't noticed, in America we don't eat the placenta. Save that stuff for the Germans!

  3. He's too much of a manly-man to do that. Hard to imagine any guy would want to be locker room fodder.

    Maybe in the off-season.

    Ahhhh, yes, I got a case of creamy thighs just thinking about it.

    And I'm German. It's the Canadians that like their placenta. Fact, jack.